We first rate the film on the 3B's SCALE: Blood, Breasts, and Beasts (Both Quality and Quantity
are considered). We give 0-5 DROPS with 5 always the highest.
Then we give an OVERALL rating using 0-5 Black Coffins.
If a film is so unpleasant that it becomes painful we bestow the frightful red death coffin.
Now if a movie gets 5 DROPS in each of the 3B's categories and 5 overall black coffins we
award it the prestigious Golden Coffin ! This is the highest possible award.
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The Midnight Meat Train (2008)
"This movie was directed by Ryuhei Kitamura, and those who
have seen his masterpiece "VERSUS" will be disappointed in
the pedestrian way he directs the film. His approach is more
American than usual, and he does almost nothing to infuse the
film with the crazy kinetic energy of his earlier films."
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Blood Spattered Bride, The (1972)
"Then things get weird. Susan refuses to give her husband
oral sex and then she begins to refuse his advances and even
hide from him at times. In this dreamlike state Susan
repeatedly stabs her sleeping husband. She later tries to kill
him for real, during a walk at the beach with the dildo dagger."
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Beyond the Darkness (1979)
" I'd like to know how this freak grew up, his childhood. He
was probably killing animals, cooking them and eating them in
his backyard. And the housekeeper is even worse than him. I
don’t know about you but I like some back story on my
murderer. I guess you can never guess what to expect when
you have pornographers making horror films. "
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Messiah of Evil (1973)
“…we soon find out that the town is under some kind of curse
because a man in a black hat walked into town one day and did
some crazy shit, then cursed the town and promised that
whenever the moon would turn blood red he would return. I
think the film suffers terrible from a lack of energy. For most of
the film the characters sit around with nothing to do.”
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Blood Seekers (1971)
With a name like “BLOOD SEEKERS” you’d think you’d be in for
a bloody treat. Then you find out it’s a tame Philippine horror
film from the ’71 which plays more like a dumb murder
mystery, and you’ll be hard-pressed to find a drop of blood. The
movie was actually filmed entirely in the Philippines in the early
sixties in black and white.
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**REVIEWS MAY
CONTAIN SPOILERS**
...AMIDST THE DUST : Noteworthy Titles from the past !!
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Guinea Pig: Mermaid in the Manhole (1988)
Yeah, he uncovers a manhole and walks around down there
amidst the trash and contemplates his childhood. He even has
memory of meeting a mermaid . To make a repetitious story
short, she decomposes, growing worse and worse each day.
With spreading sores allover her body and worms coming out
of her sores. Oh yeah… she asks him to paint her portrait
using the colored puss that comes out from her sores.
Beautiful indeed.
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Mother's Day (1980)
Essentially, this film is a rip-off (homage) to “TEXAS CHAINSAW
MASSACRE” ...After bonding in classic chick-flick fashion, the
girls are kidnapped by the boys and are summarily tied up, tied
down, and made to entertain mother.
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